Religion, According to Dylan

Story #1:

Dylan: Mom, who is the President?
Me: George W. Bush.
Dylan: Who is the prophet?
Me: Thomas S. Monson.
Dylan: Who is the temple president?
Me: Oh. Uh, I don't know...
Dylan: It's Barack Obama.

Story #2:

Dylan had done something naughty, of course.

Me: Dylan, is that what Jesus wants us to do?

Dylan: But I don't want to be a "Jesus guy."

Story #3:

Dylan: "Daddy is going to Bad Heaven."

Story #4:

Dylan: "Daddy is going to Heaven for Criminals."

Story #5:

We were having Family Home Evening a few weeks ago, and I was quizzing Dylan.

Me: Who was our first prophet?
Dylan: George Washington.

Story #6:

Dylan: "If you don't do your homework, God will kill you."

Story #7:

Dylan: "If you eat before you say the prayer for dinner, God will kill you."

Story #8:

Back in March or so, Dylan told my mom that babies are born with angel wings, and that their parents cut them off after they're born, and that's why we have shoulder blades. Mom told me this, and I later found out that Ben had told him this story. Sheesh. Maybe Ben is going to Heaven for Criminals.