Apple. Cider. Vinegar.

Dude, dude, dude.  You are not even going to believe this, but it’s true as I’m sitting here. 

So.  Plantar fasciitis (please pronounce that in your head with an over-exaggerated southern accent.  Thank you.) for a year.  I’ve had the maximum number of cortisone shots.  I’ve done all the physical therapy.  All of the stretching.  All of the taping.  Everything I could think of.  The last time I saw my podiatrist, he said that I’d have to get custom orthodics ($500) or get surgery.

I’ve noticed that the pain is different than it used to be, though.  Quite honestly, I think it’s my bone spur.  Some heel bone spurs don’t affect people.  But I think mine is inflaming the whole area.  It’s a new type of pain.  In new places.  The doc said he could go in and shave off the spur, but I was like, dude.  There must be something I can do for this spur without surgery.

So I hopped online and did some searching.  And I came across this website called earthclinic.com.  It’s a website dedicated to holistic/herbal/home remedies for problems in the body.  It’s a forum-style site.  I saw all of these testimonials about apple cider vinegar helping with joint pain, bone pain, and most of all, bone spurs.  A bunch of people drank the vinegar, but I was like, gag.  That won’t work out for me.  But then I saw that some people have actually topically wrapped apple cider vinegar-soaked cloths on their heels/knees, etc. and had really fantastic results.  And I was just so desperate that I tried it.

So.  I wrapped my heel in a cloth that had been soaked in ACV and rung out.  Soooo stinky.  Then I put a grocery bag around my foot and tied it, so I didn’t have to smell it all night and get it on my sheets.  Then I put my sleeping brace over it – a thing that holds my foot at a 90 degree angle while I sleep (it’s for plantar fasciitis, but I used it to just help hold this thing in place).  And then I wrapped a towel around my heel and tied it on top of my foot to keep the washcloth right there against my skin.   And I slept with it like that.

The next day, HUGE DIFFERENCE.  I could walk without pain for the first few hours of the day.  It was amazing.  I had to teach dance that day, and I did it with zero pain.  I could jump!  I could show these girls what I wanted them to do!  As the day progressed, it started getting sore again, so I did it again that night.  Next day, same story.  Less pain.  Dang.  I was sold.

So I did that for a week, and saw a huge improvement.  This one guy on earthclinic.com came back and said that he got an x-ray before his apple cider vinegar regimen, and then a month later, he got another x-ray, and the SPUR WAS GONE.  I don’t know how it works, guys, but for realsies.

We went on vacation, and I didn’t want to hassle with it, so I took a break from the apple cider vinegar thing.  But then I somehow pulled some tendons in my foot when we went to the beach.  So painful.  I am such a dork – my brother-in-law is in podiatry school, so I took a picture of my foot with my finger pointing to where it hurt and was like, “Ouch.  It hurts here.  Help.”  So he asked if it hurts when I push on it, when I move it here and there, so I texted him all that info, and he was like, “I think you pulled the tendon that attaches your pinky toe to the bony tuberosity on your foot.”  (Side note:  I really love the word “tuberosity.”  It just rolls off your tongue, no?)

So I went onto good old earthclinic.com.  Again, ACV was mentioned, but also, alfalfa leaves.  Ground up alfalfa leaves.  I knew I had to teach ballet yesterday, and this was Monday.  So I went to the local health foods place and bought a bottle of ACV tablets and a bottle of alfalfa tablets.   It wasn’t that expensive – like $6 per bottle, and each bottle has 100 tablets.  So I started taking the tablets on Monday, and yesterday?  I could actually walk!  And dance!  Both types of tablets reek, but I’ve been faithfully taking them.  And I’ve continued with my ACV soaks on my feet.  I’ll let you know how it goes, but I’m telling you, I really do think that some herbal remedies work.  And some don’t.  For me, at least.  I tried St. John’s Wort for my depression – nada.  But Echinacea to help shorten the duration of colds – I did that the whole time I taught school, and I swear by it.  I saw all my colleagues doing it, and it worked for them, too, because you know, teaching school, it’s like wading around in a cesspool of germs, right?

Ben thinks it’s a load of bunk.  He thinks herbal remedies are a placebo.  I tell him that if they’re a placebo, I’m good with that.  If my body is tricking itself into thinking that these pills are working and as a result, is healing itself, cool.  I’m getting results, whether my body is tricking itself or whether these things really work. 

Oh, and ACV helps with weight loss.  I saw on one of those reality TV shows with those gypsy girls (a fascinating culture.  I could watch those gypsy shows all day) that they drink it to keep their weight down, and it seems to be working for them.  A ton of people on earthclinic said it helps them with their weight.  Nice side effect, eh?  I wouldn’t feel sad about losing a few pounds on this stuff.  Because the three pounds I lost while being violently ill in Chelan?  Yeah, I gained it back.  I’m awesome like that.  Sigh.