The Ladies' Man

My sis, Lex, was home last weekend, so we decided to get together, do some eating, and do some game-playing. Gramps is home for the summer (he's a sun bird), so Mom invited him over, as well.

He's hard of hearing, so I think these get-togethers are difficult for him. The kids are all screaming and running around, and it's hard for him to catch the adult conversation. Heck, it's hard for me to catch the adult conversation. He usually just eats and leaves. And I totally understand that.

He mingled for awhile after dinner this time, though, and he and my family had such a gem of a conversation. It was HILARIOUS. I don't remember any of the ladies' names Gramps mentioned in this conversation, so I'm making them up:

Mom: So, Dad, do you want to stay and play Tripoli?

Gramps: Naw, I need to get back - a lady friend and I are going to a show tonight.

Mom: Which lady friend?

Gramps: Carolyn.

Me: Is that the lady that helped you paint some murals in your house?

Gramps: No, that's Maggie.

Me: Oh.

Gramps: Carolyn is the one I go to shows with.

Mom: Now, what is the name of your lady friend down in St. George?

Gramps: [Rolling his eyes] Judith.

Mom: [Catching the rolling of the eyes] Ohhh. Is she the reason you came home a little earlier this spring?

Gramps: Yep.

Mom: Why?

Gramps: She was getting too clingy.

[We all laugh.]

Mom: Now, what about Janet?

Gramps: [Rolling his eyes again] Oh, she's needy.

Me: Needy? Like she wants to be more serious than you do?

Gramps: No. She's just always calling me and asking for a blessing. She has a hard day - she calls and asks me to come over and give her a blessing. She gets evicted - she calls and asks me to come over and give her a blessing. She hurts her hip while she's packing to move - she calls and asks me to come over and give her a blessing. She doesn't like her new place - she calls and asks me to come over and give her a blessing.

[We all laugh again.]

Me: Wow, Gramps. You sure do have a lot of girlfriends.

Gramps: They're lady friends. They aren't girls anymore, at this age.

I love that man. He is so cute.