Thursday, January 22, 2015

That one time my mom hit on Andy Williams.

A few weeks ago, at Christmas time, my mom and I were doing some dang project at the table and listening to Christmas songs on the radio.  An Andy Williams song came on. 

Now, I'm not familiar with a lot of non-rock 'n' roll artists from the sixties, but apparently, that was his heyday.  He sounds a lot like Frank Sinatra to me.  He was famous for singing "Moon River" on the Breakfast at Tiffany's soundtrack - a gorgeous song, in my professional Kar Opinion.  He's a handsome feller:
Look at those baby blues.

And, no, he's not that one guy from the sixties who sang really, really cheesy Christmas songs.  I don't know this other dude's name, but oh, how I hate him.  He sings "Walking in a Winter Wonderland," and it's the cheesiest thing I have ever, ever heard.  My Cheesiness Tolerance Threshold is very low.  Nicholas Sparks books and movies - fugeddaboutit.  I also hate romantic comedies.  Blech.  I like action films.  That's just how I roll.  Ben and I went to Taken 3 for our anniversary.  And I was thrilled about it!  (Liam Neeson kicks BUTT!!)

My mom says that Andy Williams also popularized "Do You Hear What I Hear?"  Which is one of my favorite Christmas songs.  Ever since we sang it in 5th or 6th grade for our Christmas program at school.  Back when we could sing songs about Christ's birth.  Sheesh.  Lex sent me some videos of Gage's Holiday program at his preschool - they sang random songs about snowmen and stuff, and they sang Jingle Bells, because that doesn't mention anything religious.  And then they sang Happy Holidays to You to the tune of Happy Birthday, I believe.  It made me sad.  I don't know.  I mean, it's great that they had a program at all.  And I support separation of church and state, and I respect that there were probably a lot of kids in his class that were of other religions.  I guess what I'm trying to say is that I really love songs about Christ at Christmastime.  And I loved singing them in a school setting.  But times change, I guess.  I'll just make sure I play more religious Christmas songs in our home.

Anyways, I think that "Do You Hear What I Hear" is so magical.  And it's one of my faves. But I do have conflicting feelings about it.  At the end of the song, the king hears of Christ's birth, and he says of Christ, "He will bring us goodness and light."  Which is true, but didn't King Herod want Christ dead??  Isn't that why he originally sent the wise men out?  "Find this kid that everyone says will be the king of kings, and kill him!" I ignore that part of the song and focus on the magicality of it instead.

So when the Andy Williams song came on (I forget which one), Mom started chuckling.

"Did I ever tell you about the time I met Andy Williams?" she said.

"Wait, is that who sings this song?" I asked.


"Oh!  I thought Andy Williams was the name of that horrible cheesy guy who sings Walking in a Winter Wonderland.  You know?  How he changes keys in the middle of the word 'snow'?  He goes, "...snoooooo-OWWWW!!"  And he says in a speaking voice, "YOOOO-hoooo!"  And at the end, he goes, "...winter wonder, winter, wonderland..."  Man, I HATE that dude."

"Oh, um, no, Andy Williams is this guy who's singing right now."

"Well, good.  Then I like him.  And you MET him??"

"Yes!  At Sun Valley!  Our family was there, skiing, and I went over to the lodge to use the bathroom, and there he was, outside the lodge, waiting for his daughter."

"Were people bugging him?"

"Not at all.  Everyone was playing it cool.  And he was so nice!  He spoke to me first!  He said, 'What a beautiful day, huh?'"

"Really? That's so cool!!  So unlike when you met Clint Eastwood."

"Yeah, he was really mean to me."

"So what did you say in return??"

Mom started giggling.  "Wellll, I said to him, 'It is a beautiful day!  Say, would you like to come over to my car for some wine and cheese?'"

Then I started giggling.  "Um, WHAT?? You propositioned Andy Williams???"

"No!  No!  This is what my family did!  We'd take little breaks during skiing and ask friends or people we had met on the mountain to come back to our car for wine and cheese!"

[Let me insert here that my mom and her family weren't active in the LDS church at this time.]

"Well, he probably thought you were propositioning him, Ma.  How old were you? 

"Oh, 17 or 18."

"OMG, so you were this hot young thing, propositioning this major recording star!  Haha!  What did he say???"

"He looked a little uncomfortable and said something like, 'No thank you,' and wandered off to find his daughter."

Good for him.  A family man.  I like it.

What kills me about this story are two things:  1)  My mom accidentally hit on an older, famous, married man.  That's hilarious.  2)  How did I not ever, ever hear this story until now??  I've known my mom for 37 years!!  And it's a major, really funny story!  I shall certainly be telling this story down through the ages.  It's a keeper.


Sherron said...

Johnny Mathis is the name. We'll have to agree to disagree because I love his Christmas album cheese and all. :)

Mindy H. said...

AWESOME story. Just Awesome. It made me laugh after an obnoxious week. Thanks for sharing! But now I want to hear the Clint Eastwood story...

Megan said...

Haha! How funny!! Love the story! I never could've done that when I was a teenager! lol

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