Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Anyways, when your child is the Superstar, you put some photos on a poster and then go in and talk about your kid to her class. This is the Superstar poster I did last year for Dylan, when he was in preschool. I like to make my posters all scrapbookey. Here is Sadie's:
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
My Grandma Spracher died two years ago, and we girls hadn't been to the gravesite since her burial. Lex was visiting a few weeks ago, and we decided to make the trek to Rigby to take a look at Grams' grave. We hadn't seen the gravestone yet - it's so beautiful:
My Grandma H used to put five pinecones on my Grandpa H's grave every time she visited. They stood for five words: "I will always love you." I think stuff like that is so neat. Ben and I will have to figure something out that we can do if one of us dies before the other, which is pretty likely. :) I wish we could die at the exact same time.
Here are me, Nat, and Lex (I look like such a piece of crap next to them!!):
And Nat, Lex, and Mom:
Mom told the cutest story about Grams that I hadn't heard before - she and Gramps were praying one time, and Gramps is hard of hearing, and he couldn't hear Grams' prayer. So he goes, "Speak up!" And Grams says, "I'm not talking to you."
This is the grave of my great-grandpa:
And his first wife - she died when Gramps was only five, of impetigo:
My mom brought a couple of her beautiful roses to put on the grave:
Monday, October 27, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Okay, so I'm stealing this from Jenny's blog. Her brother (and my brother-in-law), Spence (whose nickname is Moose), works for the Buffalo Bills, helping them run plays and stuff. I just think that is so freakin' cool. He loves football so much, so this must be like a dream job for him, to work for a professional team. Anyways, he is in a video clip here. And, to copy and paste what Jenny said:
He's wearing a long sleeved gray shirt
and dark shorts, and is the guy
handing the ball to the QB, Trent Edwards
in the first half of the video.
You can see him 3 times. :)
I love that picture. I've gotten it in a couple of e-mails, and it makes me laugh so hard, because that is exactly how I feel when I'm riding a roller-coaster. I am such a chicken! I swear, one of these days, on a roller-coaster ride, I'm just going to faint dead away.
Anywho, Dylan and I got into our car accident, like, six weeks ago, but I forgot to write about Dylan's reaction to it and the aftermath. After we hit the guy (remember, it wasn't my fault! My brakes went out on me at a busy intersection!) and spun around a few times and came to a stop, Dylan just started yelling at me: "Why did you just hit him? Don't you know how to drive?!?" He was just ticked. Later, when we were on the sidewalk and the police were interviewing everyone, Dylan started crying. I was hugging him and telling him how sorry I was, and he muttered, "Mom, you scared my body." That is such an apt way of describing it! I, myself, was still shaking.
Ever since then, Dylan has been dealing with, like, PTSD. Anytime we go anywhere in the car, Dylan is constantly reminding me to brake, to slow down, that yellow means slow down, that red means stop, etc. etc. etc. If I get into the left turn lane, he's like, "Why are you SWERVING??? Are we going to hit someone again?" I keep reassuring him that, yes, I do know how to drive, and that the accident we got into was not my fault, but he still is a total backseat driver now. But his fear makes sense. It takes me months, emotionally, to get over accidents. Once, I got rear-ended, and for like a year, I was always watching my rear-view mirror when I was at stop lights. I was convinced I would get rear-ended again. And sometimes, if a car looked like it was coming too quickly, I would start gasping, and my heart would start pounding, and I would kind of brace myself for the inevitable rear-end. So Dylan's manicness makes sense. Poor kid.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
8 Favorite TV shows
2. Pushing Daisies
3. Journeyman (I think it got cancelled. I'm sad about that.)
4. The Office
5. 30 Rock
6. City Confidential
7. Cold Case
8. Notorious (The last three are true crime shows. I love those kinds of shows. I don't know why.)
8 Things I did yesterday
1. Got up at the buttcrack of dawn to feed the baby.
2. Took Sadie to preschool.
3. Jogged 2.5 miles on the treadmill (I moved it up to 2.75 miles today, and boy, am I feeling the burn. Pain, pain, pain...)
4. Made homemade mac and cheese for dinner. I was being lazy.
5. Picked up Sadie from preschool.
6. Took Sadie to speech therapy.
7. Worked on my mom's birthday present.
8. Blogged, of course!!
8 Favorite places to eat
2. The Pizza Factory
3. Cafe Rio
4. Macaroni Grill
5. Texas Roadhouse
6. The Claimjumper
8. California Pizza Kitchen (most on this list aren't in I.F. Sigh...)
8 things I'm looking forward to
1. Sleeping with my heating pad on my thighs tonight.
2. Taking out my contacts. My eyes feel like cement right now.
3. Finishing up my mom's birthday present tonight.
4. Friday - no preschool. That means Sadie can sleep in and won't be a beyotch to me all day. She is not a morning person.
5. Friday - I'm going out of town with my parents! No kids for two whole days!!
6. Going home and eating dinner.
7. And then cuddling with my hubby-hubster. Maybe I'll put off finishing my mom's present until tomorrow... Yeah. Cuddling is #1 priority.
8. Stake conference on Sunday - I don't have to prepare a lesson! Yee-hah!
8 things I love about this Fall-
1. I'm already done planting my daffodils! Dylan and I planted them together.
2. Dylan and I had to gather a bunch of leaves for a school project. That was so much fun.
3. Sweater weather. Love it.
4. Cooking more. I love warm desserts in crisp weather.
5. Heating up the car in the morning. There is nothing better than loading up the kids into a toasty warm car.
6. General conference.
7. Staring at the cute Halloween and fall decorations at craft stores. Maybe I can get something my next paycheck... I have the dumbest Halloween decorations ever.
8. My mom's Halloween decorations. They are so cute.
8 things on my wish list
1. Lasik surgery.
2. I'd love to get down to a size seven again, but I don't know if that is planning for failure... I haven't been a seven since college.
3. I wish Sadie and Dylan would mind me more, without me always having to threaten them with time outs or being grounded.
4. I wish I could afford to dance at a studio - pay for adult classes.
5. I wish our medical bills were paid off.
6. I wish Micah would eat more.
7. I wish I could go on a nice vacation with my hubby.
8. I wish I could buy more jeans for Dylan and Ben. And a coat for Sadie. And a coat for Micah... Those things will take priority over cute Halloween decorations. :) One paycheck at a time...
We, like Patty and her sisters, had to clean the kitchen every night, which was always annoying, but looking back on it now, it taught us a good work ethic and actually ended up being quality family time. Mom would always turn on a CD, and we'd sing and dance while washing dishes. I liked to pop in my INXS CD, because on this one song, "Suicide Blonde," our dog, Ebony, would get totally riled up. She'd start jumping up and down and barking and running around in circles. It was hilarious. One of us would rinse dishes, another would stack 'em, a third would clear the food and dishes, and the fourth would wipe off. And then mom would sweep. But it changed every night, so some nights I would sweep, etc. When Nat and I had rinsing and wiping off duties, respectively, we'd fight over the faucet. Our solution for the faucet conundrum was always one of two things. We'd either give each other thirty seconds with the faucet, then switch it to the other person. Or, one of us would use the sprayer and spray for thirty seconds, and then let the faucet-user use the water from the faucet for thirty seconds. I know; lame. The wiper-offer could have always just waited until the dishes were rinsed. But we were always in a hurry to get done, so that we could get to our homework. And, obviously, because there was a sprayer involved, we got into plenty of waterfights. I'm surprised that Mom didn't get more mad about the messes we made when we got into these waterfights. I know I would flip out if my kids did that!! I really need to loosen up. Hmmm....
Once, Dad was working during dinner because it was tax season, and we girls got into a food fight at the dinner table. I just remember thinking how funny it would be to fling applesauce at Lex, because she was being naughty, so I did it. And the food fight began. Mom was sooo mad that she made us stand against the counter and threw chicken parts at us. We were like, "Ouch! Mom!! Owww!!"
And once, Nat and I were fighting over the last piece of pie in the fridge, and Mom shoved us both outside and then ate it in front of us; we could see her, because we had french doors. She was all, "Yummmm..." and we were screaming, "Nooooooooooo!!!"
Mom taught us a thousand times how to play jacks, but we always forgot. So we always played a game with them that we called "Fifi and Foofoo." We'd spin each jack on one of its pointy ends and count the seconds that it spun. The one that spun the longest time was named "Fifi." Second runner-up was named "Foofoo." Then we'd have, like, best two out of three and stuff, to see if Fifi really was the best spinner.
We played this game where we'd lie on our backs, with our feet touching, and we'd foot-wrestle. We called it "Feety Fight." There was really no object. If our legs fell down, or if someone's foot came off the other person's foot, we'd just replace it and keep wrestling.
We still enjoy the "Clapping Game." Two of us will stand, facing each other, maybe two feet apart. And then you clap your hands together, trying to knock the other girl off her balance. We get a big kick out of making fun of each others' clapping style. Nat always wore a lot of rings, and she had bony fingers anyways, so when she clapped my hands, I would be almost crying from the pain!! Brianna's clapping style was like a barrage of cannon fire. She'd just clap-clap-clap-clap relentlessly. Lexi liked to grab my hands and psych me out that way. Nat says that I would always yell "Wooo!!" and kind of glance off the tops of her hands into a double Heil Hitler kind of a salute.
When I was an EFY counselor, I learned the game Zip Bong, and we played that on road trips all the time, especially if we had to stand in line a lot, like at Universal Studios or Disneyland. We'd arrange ourselves into a circle and play. The rule is that you can't show your teeth. So you cover your teeth with your lips (hard to do for all of us, because we all have big teeth), then move the play either clockwise or counter-clockwise by saying to the person next to you, "Zip." They can pass it along by saying "zip" to their other neighbor, or they can pass it back to you by saying "Bong." And we would try to make each other smile by making weird eyes and using weird voices. It was hilarious. I think it really embarrassed Dad. We were always embarrassing Dad. :) We're kind of a gregarious bunch. I know that our husbands get a little overwhelmed when we're all together, because we're quite hyper.
We still play Nertz whenever we get together. It's a game I learned at Ricks. We have dubbed it "Bitter Nertz," because we all have a tendency to get really bitter while we play. We say the meanest stuff to each other when we're playing! It gets intense. But it's really fun. And we've kind of made up our own little lexicon to go with it. "Coving" is when someone is laying down cards too close to their own piles, like a little cove on a lake that no one else has discovered. And we yell at each other for not clearing away King piles, or for making a mess of the central playing area. Once, we were playing so intensely, and Brianna was beating us, of course, because her mind is like a freaking computer, and Dad yelled, "I'm just sitting here pooping my pants!" It was a classic moment. Once, we added like thirty extra cards to Brianna's pile, and SHE STILL BEAT US!!
Nat was always the peacemaker, but when she was pushed hard enough, WATCH OUT!! Once, Lex was bugging her in some way, and she wouldn't stop, so Nat did a Tai Bo move on her and totally kicked her in the stomach! And then Nat tackled Lex and stuck her feet in Lex's face. It was sooooo funny. And once (I wasn't there for this one), Mom, Nat, Lex, and Beads went to Utah State for Nat to take some scholarship test, and on their way home, Lex and Beads were fighting over some toy. And Nat, without a word, grabbed the toy, rolled down her window, and threw it out. I giggle just picturing it.
I obviously could go on and on, but one more story. It was Thanksgiving, and I think my Aunt Marilyn and Uncle Boyd and a couple of our cousins were over. We had all eaten and were playing downstairs, and I went upstairs to get rolls for me and Nat. And we were breaking off pieces of roll and trying to throw them into each others' mouths across the room. We obviously weren't succeeding. Nat decided to throw a "bullet throw" (versus a "rainbow throw") to my mouth, and it totally landed right in my mouth! It was like 50 miles an hour, I swear! It was so funny.
So that's us. We're super! We're spastic! We're super, and we're spastic! And we're sprinkler heads! Sprinkler heads! We're super-spastic sprinkler heads! Cha-cha-cha-cha, chachachachacha... A little EFY cheer for ya.
Entertainment Weekly did an article about the Twilight movie a few months ago - you can read the article and see the pictures here. I was reading this week's issue of EW, and they put in some "outtake" pictures from the past year - pictures they chose not to publish originally (they probably couldn't find anything newsworthy this week, so they dusted off the outtake pictures from photo shoots and said, "Let's throw these in!"). They put this picture in, and since I'm obsessed with Twilight, I thought I'd scan it and throw it on here. (By the way, this isn't a scene from the movie. It's just a creative idea for a photo shoot.) Robert Pattinson is soooooooooo cute...
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Apparently platypi have enormous teeth. Dylan says that the platypus is going to eat him in that picture. :)
And a rabbit, a spider, and an ox on top of a manta ray, according to Dylan. That is one huge spider:
So funny. I love it.
Monday, October 20, 2008
No, I didn't recently have appendicitis or have my appendix taken out, thank goodness. I'm referring to another definition for the word appendix: "supplementary material usually attached at the end of a piece of writing." But could I find a picture of a book-appendix? Nope. So you get a lovely picture of the anatomical appendix. :)
Alright. I did a tag kind of like this one a couple of weeks ago, and Em just tagged me with it, but I noticed that her tag had a few that my previous similar-tag didn't, so this post is an appendix to my previous tag:
I am: loving root beer and cream soda lately. It’s so bizarre.
I know: how to write a good essay.
I want: to buy Ben some more jeans. We bought him one pair last Saturday – hallelujah!
I have: little pimples on my arms. I learned somewhere that’s from eating too much bread? It would make sense, since I’m the Bread Queen. That’s what they call me.
I dislike: my neighbors.
I miss: my friends from college.
I feel: a little UTI-ish. I think I’m getting one, but I’m trying to “will” it back to where it came from. I really don’t feel like dealing with one of those right now.
I hear: the sound of heat coming from the wall-heater in my office.
I smell: like a man. I ran out of my deodorant and had to use Ben’s today. Ew.
I crave: sweets. “All de time,” as Sebastian on The Little Mermaid would say. Sadie’s on a Little Mermaid kick, so it's on the mind.
I cry: not nearly enough. I’m on anti-depressants, which dry up the tears. I don’t even remember the last time I cried. Um… oh, wait. I remember. When I finished the Twilight series. I was depressed that I was done reading. This is why I haven’t picked them back up again. I don’t think it’s healthy. :)
I don’t: like to run, but I still do it every day.
I forget: to remind Ben of important things. Like, right now, I’m wondering if he remembered to ask his boss for Friday off. Because I forgot to remind him. Which means there’s a 99% chance that Ben forgot to ask.
"Oh. Well, what does P-V-R-J-I spell?"
He thinks that, if he puts random letters together, it will automatically spell something. The other day, he kept trying to write "words" by putting random letters together:
So then he got an idea - he would copy "real" words off of stuff in our house. This:
post about Voom on her blog last February. You should go check it out.
This is the name of our microwave:
Not sure where he got this from:
Last night, Dylan goes, "Dad, what does S-O-N-Y spell?" And Ben was totally not paying any attention, so Dylan, of course, repeated himself louder: "DAD, WHAT DOES S-O-N-Y SPELL???"
Ben still didn't pay attention; he was watching stupid Family Guy (which should be called Blasphemy Central. I hate that show. I tell Ben that, one of these days, he is going to get struck by lightning while watching it). Because Ben wasn't paying attention, he figured that Dylan was spelling some random word, as usual, so Ben yells, "DYLAN, I'M SO SICK OF THIS!!! JUST BECAUSE YOU PUT LETTERS TOGETHER DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE MAKING A WORD!!!!"
I quietly put down the dish I was drying, walked into the living room, and said, "Ben, he was spelling 'Sony.' He must have gotten it off the DVD player."
Sunday, October 19, 2008
So, a couple of weeks ago, my Young Women's lesson was on how everyone in the world is our spirit brother and sister, that we all have divine qualities, etc. So I did my FHE on that the next night. I cut out those little linked paper doll things, and I had my family try to make each person on the paper doll chain look like they were from a different country, kind of to drive home that we are all "linked," even if we look different and have different cultures. These paper dolls turned out sooo funny, so I scanned them for your enjoyment.
Here's Dylan's. Sorry; these are kind of hard to see:
Friday, October 17, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
The title of this post comes from Zoolander:
...which would be a way funnier movie if they took out that one yucky scene. You know the one I'm talking about.
Okay, I made sure that neither of the kids' privates are actually showing. Their legs kind of covered the private parts up. So I feel okay about posting this video, because it's so cute. Dylan came up with the idea all by himself:
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
One of my new blogging friends, Janiece, is part of a little blogging group that does this thing every Tuesday called "Self-Portrait Tuesdays," or "SPT." (I can tell these are my kind of ladies, because I love initials. I make everything into initials. Another little quirk of mine. I have many.) Every Tuesday, their ringleader, Lelly, "assigns" them something to write about themselves on their blog. I adore reading Janiece's SPT's - I'm just getting to know her, so I'm gobbling up every self-portrait. She is such an interesting person!
At one point, Lelly assigned her friends to write 100 things about themselves. And, over the last few weeks, on Tuesdays, she has asked her friends to expound upon certain things from that list they made. This week, she assigned them to expound upon their #14 of their list of 100 things.
I thought, heck, I've done the "100 Things About Myself" Tag, so I might as well join "Self Portrait Tuesday" this week. Except today is Wednesday, so I'm doing SPW. I'm going to expound on my #14, which is: "I love to buy interesting postage stamps."
There are certain things that just bring a bounce to my step, and those things are buying interesting postage stamps and buying interesting checks. I love asking the postal workers what their new postage stamps are and selecting some that are really cool and interesting. Unfortunately, the last time I was in, I had all three kids with me, and there was a huge line, so I opted to buy really boring Liberty Bell stamps from the little kiosk instead. So... for the last few weeks, no bounce to my step.
Maybe I should collect stamps? Since I derive so much pleasure from interesting postage stamps? I don't know... Nat and I were talking about collections the other day - neither of us really collect anything. Nothing is compelling enough to us. Except all of our family members have decided that Nat is going to collect turtle figurines. She doesn't necessarily like turtles or anything - it all started with Mom, who got Nat a little bobble-head turtle wooden thing from some exotic vacation locale, and it grew from there. So now she has, like, seven little turtles on her piano, all bought for her from family members who have decided that she needs to collect them. When family members go on trips, they bring back turtles for Nat. I haven't ever collected anything, because there's just nothing I adore that much, you know? Like I have a friend who collects dolphins. Another friend who collects crucifix necklaces. But I just can't find anything I'm passionate enough about. And though I like interesting stamps, if I'm going to buy something fun for myself, it will be clothes, cool decor for my house, or scrapbooking stuff. And if people are going to buy me something, I'd much rather it be a cool professional photograph, or an artsy sculpture, or something. Or a magnet for my fridge. Or a cool logo t-shirt. Something a little more practical and visual than a stamp that will get shut away in a book.
Hey, I've got it! I can collect books. I feel passionately about books! Good idea, Kar. Good idea. So, Mom, if you want to get me a souvenir from your upcoming trip, you could buy me New Moon from the airport bookstore. Then my Twilight collection could be complete! (Except for a gaping hole where Midnight Sun will never be... sniff... And except for the other hole where Twilight should be, because Nat and Pete "borrowed" it, and I'm worried that they have "borrowed" it forever!!) I'm not saying you have to buy me a souvenir, Ma, but if you wanna... New Moon, baby. New Moon.
Take the Quiz and Share Your Results!
Oh, wait. Just found this from that website, which describes why I'm an Esme:
You are thoughtful and care very deeply for your family. A loving home is of great
importance to you and you always try to make people feel welcome. Although you have a great capacity to love, you also have a great capacity to hurt, so at times you can be
sensitive. You're firm when you need to be, but people trust your judgment and
appreciate the kind way you always handle things.
Well, per my usual tradition, I'm posting this about a month too late... sigh...
Mom took Nat and I to a play called Nunsense, and it was so cute. It kind of reminded me of Forever Plaid, but with nuns. :) And Sally Struthers was in it!! Sally STRUTHERS, in little ol' Idaho Falls!! She played the Reverend Mother, and she did a great job. She is really funny. There's a part where she accidentally sniffs a mysterious substance she found in one of her students' lockers (I guess the nuns run a Catholic high school) and gets stoned, and it's a pretty funny scene. There were a lot of Catholic jokes, which totally went over my head, but it was still really well-done. And the singers were phenomenal.
I'm too young to have watched the TV show that made Sally Struthers popular, All in the Family, but Mom says it was cute. I'm a fan of her work in those infomercials in the eighties, where she was saying that you could get your degree via correspondence in seven or eight fields. Do you remember those? They were on for years. Nat and I used to be able to recite that commercial, word-for-word (we watched a little too much TV growing up), but I can't remember it now. And I'm obviously a big fan of her work in Gilmore Girls, one of my favorite TV shows of all time!!
Sally Struthers has such a raspy voice. Very distinctive. She could probably make a pretty decent living doing voice-over work. It's working for that guy who played Doc in the Back to the Future movies. He's totally a voice on a kids' show on PBS. He plays the bad guy. What is that show called?... Dang. Gilbert Gottfried is another voice on that show - he plays a parrot sidekick to these four kids who use math to solve problems. Eh. I'm a little unpracticed in PBS lately. My kids prefer Cartoon Network.
Anyways, Ma, thanks for taking us to the play. It was really enjoyable, and it was sooo nice to get away from my kids for awhile. If it wasn't for you, I don't think I would ever do anything fun!! :) And I cannot freakin' wait to go to Thriller in a week and a half!! Woot-woot!!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Dylan was flexing his muscles for me the other day, and he goes, "Look, mom, I can touch my hand to my shoulder. Those muscle guys on TV can't even do that, but I can!!" I totally remember thinking that same thing when I was little! I would see, like, body-builders on TV, and they would be flexing their arms so hard, and it looked like they were just really trying to touch their shoulders, but couldn't. But I could do it, easily! I figured that I was pretty much the strongest person alive.
Monday, October 13, 2008
My mom was partially in charge of her 35-year class reunion this last weekend, and she, of course, planned it to the hilt! She made these cute centerpieces:
dish part was left over from Brianna's wedding reception a couple of years ago. She was all worried about the centerpieces being good enough, and she asked me to help her send the pictures via the internet to a couple of her co-planners for approval (like they would hate such a cute centerpiece). It seems that this is one of my Official Family Jobs - helping people send pictures via e-mail. It's funny that something technological has found its way to my unofficial Family Job List, since I am a technophobe.
Do you want to know my other family jobs? I knew you did!! Here they are:
1. Scapegoat. Once, I was baby-sitting Alexis, and she was, like, nine, and she scorched the microwave when she popped popcorn. Did Lexi get into trouble? Nope. It was my fault. Even though she could read. And was nine years old.
2. Alarm clock. Natalie could not get up in the mornings. Both of our bedrooms were downstairs, so the job of getting her butt out of bed fell into my lap. I'd have to turn on the lights, open the curtains, open the window, jump on her bed, yell, turn on the radio, and pull her covers off to get her up every morning. :)
3. Soda-getter. Even though I had the longest legs, when we went on road trips, I was stuck on the half-width seat in the back, with Nat. And the cooler was always behind me, and since I also had the longest arms, it was my job to reach back and get any soda or cool snacks that anyone desired. It made me soooo car sick.
4. Listener. When anyone needs to talk or is upset, they call me. I don't mind this job. It's actually very flattering.
And now, since I have helped Gramps and my mom scan and/or send pictures via e-mail, this is another of my jobs, I guess!
While Mom was here, having me retrieve the centerpiece picture from her camera and send it, she asked me to scan this picture:
Then she had me send it to an old friend; I don't remember who. It was taken when she went to BYU-Hawaii. She's the girl on the left. Isn't she so freaking cute? She told me that she got a really tight perm before she went over there, and how ugly her hair was the whole time she was there, but I don't see any ugliness in this picture! All I see is a dish.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
I loved the movie for several reasons. First, because the role of Cody was played by my favorite, Shia LeBoeuf:
Second, because the role of Cody's love interest, Lani, was played by Zooey Deschanel, who I also love (and who is in my favorite movie, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy):
Third, because Surf's Up is a mockumentary, in the grand old tradition of Waiting for Guffman:
And Best in Show:
(Parenthetically, Ben's and my favorite part of Best in Show is when Jennifer Coolidge's Sherri Ann Cabot:
is talking about her marriage to her octogenerian husband: "We both really like soup... and we could talk... or not talk... for hours...")
At that time, our family was in need of another beach towel, so we let Dylan pick one, since Sadie was really too young to figure out the concept of picking things. So Dylan chose a towel with Cody Maverick on it. And he called it his "Dude Towel." Apparently, he had decided that surfers are called "dudes":
Which makes sense, because surfers are always saying "Dude..." That's a reasonable assumption to make. And, by the way, one of the last times we went to the beach last year, before we moved to Idaho, we saw a few sixtyish-year-old men surfing and yelling out words like "Bro!" and "Dude!" to each other. I laughed so hard!
Anyways, last fall, our family went to the park to shoot off rockets for Family Home Evening, and there were some gothic guys hanging out on the fountain, in the area where we were shooting rockets. Here is the picture I chose to convey "gothic":
And when those quite scary guys left, Dylan goes, "Those guys were Dudes." So apparently, Dudes were now surfers and gothic guys.
I just absolutely have to insert a funny gothic-related story right here. So, back when I was a teacher, I was wearing, like, a red shirt and a jean skirt, or something. And I decided to wear red lipstick to match my red shirt. Like I would wear pink lipstick with a red shirt! I am a matchie-matchster, as you may recall. (Although now, I don't wear lipstick at all. Gloss. It's all about gloss for me now.) And I started noticing, throughout the day, that kids in the hall were staring at me and whispering behind their hands. And staring at my mouth while I taught. I kept checking to see if there was lipstick on my teeth, but I had done the "stick the finger in the mouth and fit the lips around the finger while pulling it out to make sure that no lipstick gets on the teeth" trick, and I couldn't see any lipstick or lingering broccoli or anything. So finally, sixth hour, this kid comes up to me and goes, "Mrs. Smith, are you going goth?" I looked down at my red-shirt-and-jean-skirt ensemble, then looked back up, and said, "Why would you say that, Brian?"
"Well, because of your red lipstick."
"Um, Brian, goths wear black lipstick. Not red lipstick. Black."
What a weirdo! I laughed so hard. This is one of the many times that my outfits were picked apart by my students. I'll have to talk about that at length in a different post.
Back to the topic at hand. Now we have come upon a third definition of a "dude" - one with a fauxhawk:
Dylan told me that one of his best friends at school is a "dude."
I said, rather confusedly, "Oh, he wears all black?"
Dylan looked at me like I was crazy: "No..."
"Oh. Well, um, does he surf??"
Dylan, again with the quizzical look: "No..."
"So what makes him a dude?"
"He has spikey hair, but only in the middle, like a line."
And Dylan wants a fauxhawk so badly. The thing is, he has hair as thick as a horse's. When I try to grow it a little longer on the top, it ends up being frizzy and curly and sticking to his head. I try to put gel on it to make it "spikey," but it falls back down to the head within about a minute. I've just never seen such thick hair in my life. When I pour water on his head when I give him baths, the water slicks right off of it, like water beading up and sliding harmlessly off a duck's back. So Dylan's dream of being a dude is just not going to happen, not at my hands, at least. Because I have better things to do than try to make a course-haired fauxhawk. He can figure it out when he's old enough to do his own hair. :)