Friday, February 10, 2012

Scanning Shenanigans


So, a few weeks after we got home from China, I started scanning at my dad's office again. Which I really love doing. It's easy work. I see progress being made, which is different than the housework I do at home. And I get a little break from my kids. Sadly, since Ben went back to China, I don't get to scan as often as I used to. My mom sometimes watches my kiddos so I can get away and earn a few bucks here and there. And an adorable gal in my ward, Dawn, offered to watch my kids a couple of days ago while I worked.

My sis, Nat, wrote a post on her blog about scanning memories, which made me laugh so hard I nearly peed my pants. And maybe you won't find it as funny, because you weren't there, but I loved this post and so badly want to have it on my blog, and eventually in the book that I'll print of my blog, so I'm putting it up here. You won't regret reading this, my friends. Nat is a much, much better writer than I am. The girl is crazy talented in so, so, so many ways.

Working Girl

I haven’t been blogging as much, I think in part because I’ve been working so much-teaching piano, helping with three kids’ homework, and, of course, working at my Dad’s office doing cleaning and scanning.
Which brings me to today’s Memory Monday topic: scanner girl memories. Oh, where do I begin?

I’ve done scanning on and off for a very, very long time. I swear I was only 13 or 14 when I started scanning there. It was my summer job all through high school, and then again in college (summers of ’99 and 2000). Oh, and not to mention the time I worked there when we first moved to Idaho Falls before I had Troy, so in 2005-2006.
So. When I was 13-14 years old, we had this REALLY old scanning machine. It had its own set of discs that were humongous, and very unlike normal computer discs. It was probably 5”x5”, and an inch thick. Somehow they were able to convert the Beast Discs into CDs or something. If we wanted the machine to read a page as front-and-back, we had to put in a special paper with little squares colored in for it to do it right. Same with if the page was too dark or too light-same special paper, but with a different square colored in.

At the time, the scanner was set up in the same room as the kitchen area stuff, so we were right by the fridge. There was a lady that worked there at the time who was addicted to Diet Coke. During the time that we (we meaning my sister Karlenn and I) were there, which was maybe half a day of work, this lady came down to the fridge to get a Diet Coke about 5 times. And each time she came down she would ask, “Having fun?”
Now, Diet Coke Lady wasn’t the only one to frequent the kitchen area. She was there the most, but she was not the only one. And each person would ask the same question: Having fun? We never quite knew what to reply to that. “Yes, yes I am. Scanning is a dream job!” “No, not really. I hate being here.” “Not only am I having fun, but I’m working hard, too! Two thumbs up!” I mean, what DO you say in response? So usually we’d just laugh a little, but I think that egged The Question on.

At that time, we were TERRIBLE scanners. If it missed a page (sometimes the machine would suck in two or three pages at a time), we would just let it keep going, pull out the pages that it missed, and just stuck them in wherever it was most convenient. I’m sure we missed backs of pages a lot. And we had no idea what to title things. I think at the time, though, we would just put it under the client name and the year. So when the accountants went to find things, I’m sure it was a nightmare, because there would be 10 different files all under the same client and year.
Oh, and it’s not like you could just look it up any old way, either. We had these printouts of what was on each Beast Disc, and which Beast Discs were on which CDs. So we’d have to look at this teeny tiny print to try and find out where the file was at, and then hopefully it was labeled with the right year and the right client. Good times right there.

The summer after my junior year, I was still working with Kar. We were in the kitchen for part of the time, but then we moved into an office across the hall when a dude moved out. His name was Oak. Not even joking. My dad has had several randomly-named people work for him: Clain, Oak…okay, I know there’s more, but that’s all I can remember right now. Clain had a cool last name, too – it was French, but I’m omitting it now for privacy purposes.
During that summer I was dating Ned. Ah, Ned. More good times right there. Anyway, our scanner machine totally broke. Just…wouldn’t scan, wouldn’t suck up pages, nothing. So we had to call an 800 number. We reached a guy named Dave that worked in Salt Lake for the Scanner Fixer Company. So he came up to fix it, and it was kind of awkward. We just sat there and prepped files while he cleaned the machine, etc. By the way, he was really young, I think just fresh off his mission, which at the time seemed really old to me, but whatever - I was 17. (I’m 17. I’m 17! -What movie?)

After Dave fixed the machine, it broke, like, 2 days later. We called back down to the Scanner Fixer Company, and once again it was Dave that came up. This time it was way different. We totally talked to him, and kind of made fun of him for being a tech nerd.
I’m pretty sure the machine broke again, because I remember we called the place again and requested Dave to come up. Hm, maybe he was trying to make the machine break so he could hang out with us. Because even though I was 17, my hot sister was 19, so maybe he was trying to bust a move or something, though he never asked her out.

You know what’s funny, though? A year or so later, Dave got married in Logan, Utah, and he sent us an invitation to the reception! And…yes, my sister and I TOTALLY attended! It was very awkward, trying to explain to his new wife that he had “fixed” our scanner, and that’s how we knew him.
One more point from this summer, and then I’m going to have to make a Part 2. After we moved into the other room, we didn’t have to deal with The Question any more, which was nice. Our office was next to a guy named Robert. We teased him ALL the time, just by calling him nicknames. He’d be all, “My name is Robert,” all deadpan. And we’d be all, “Hey Bobby? Question for ya.” And he’d be all, “It’s ROBERT.” (Has anyone seen the movie-I think it’s called Office Space? I caught it on TV once. There’s a dude that’s all quiet, and people always steal his stapler. At the end he goes all crazy and, like, blows stuff up or something. I could totally be making that up, because it’s been a long time since I’ve seen that movie. Anyway. Robert was like that dude.)

Okay, THAT tangent over. Anyway, we gave him other nicknames like Bobert, Robbie, Rob, Bob, and Robert Probert. The last one is someone’s actual name that at one point had been a client of my dad’s firm. (Hm. Wonder if he’s still around somewhere.) We thought it was really funny that someone with the last name Probert would have no creativity and name their child’s first name Robert. I mean, come on! There was also a client named Thomas Thompson. Seriously?
Anyway, since we moved into a more secluded room, we could have a radio. We listened to a station called Z103. We would keep tally of which songs got played the most, aptly named The Most-Played Song of the Summer. One of the songs that was big at the time was called Butterfly Kisses. It’s a REALLY cheesy song. So we were listening to that, and we both started singing at the TOP of our lungs. “BUTTERFLY KISSES, in the blah blah blah!” Okay, totally don’t remember the lyrics now. Anyway, a lady named Maggie that worked upstairs paged down to us on the phone, and was all, “Um, we can totally hear you up here.” So funny.

Another song that was in rotation at the time was a song called “I’m a B----“. So one day my sister started singing that one: “I’m a B, I’m a lover, I’m a child, I’m a mother, I’m a sinner I’m a saint…” And Robert came over, stood in our doorway, and just stared at us for a while. I think he was trying not to laugh, although I couldn’t be sure, because I don’t know if he was capable of laughing. But it was totally funny.

* Kay, this is Kar again. See? Toldja Nat was a great writer. And now I've got these memories written down, and I didn't even have to do it! Yessss. Hey, I'm like one of those really popular bloggers that have "Guest Posts." Sweet. Now I guess I have to do a giveaway of some sorts, eh? I can give away one of Sadie's many, many cute little valentines... Or perhaps one of the used-up Capri Sun pouches Micah leaves lying all around the house. Maybe some mooshed up bananas, courtesy of Gage?

2 comments:

megan said...

Haha Kar! I like that last paragraph:) You're funny! And Nat is a great writer!

Emily Empey said...

Nat is a good writer! i remember reading this on her blog!

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