My Weird, Weird Husband - Part 2

On Halloween night, I have to take the kids trick-or-treating, and Ben gets to hand out candy at home. I really, really wish it was the other way around, but he gets so much joy out of scaring the crap out of trick-or-treaters that I sigh and trudge out the door with the kiddos.

This year, he wore the same outfit that he's worn for, like, ten years. I suppose I should wash it. Hmmm. Anyways. Last year, he wore black makeup on his feet, hands, and face. And he got it all over the house. And I had to clean it up. It made me really mad.

This year, I told him no black makeup allowed.

So, he bought fake blood instead:

And he got that all over the house. And I cleaned it up.

Dylan ended up deeply regretting his ninja costume. He decided he wanted to be something really creepy. So he morphed his costume to kind of look like his dad, and then got fake blood on his hands:

He thought he was soooo cool. He keeps telling me that, next year, he's going to dress up in something really scary. He takes after his weird dad.

We go over to my parents' house every Halloween to show them the kids' costumes. When the kids and I got home from trick-or-treating, I was like, "Ben, let's go over to my parents'!"

He frowned and was like, "But then I won't get to hand out candy..."

I was like, "Dude, just put it in the bowl on the front porch with a note."

"But I really want to scare kids."

Sigh. "Okayyyyy."

As I was packing the three oldest kids in the car, some trick-or-treaters came to our door. Ben opened the door, growling and scaring them, and then said in a gravelly voice, "Ohhh, sorry. I was just eating a baby..... Heheheheheh..."

I rolled my eyes and left.